I think I'm going slightly mad(der).
Decreasing the meds is giving me brain zaps. It seems that my brain just wants the damn serotonin, but I don't know what else I can do: even with the lowest possible dose, if I don't take it one day, it complains!
Possibly related, I had such a bad night of sleep Sunday night that I didn't make it to work on Monday. Spent most of the day like a zombie (braaaains), knitting plain stockinette (and now my Healing Cardi has nearly 1 sleeve!).
I've also stopped wanting to go to Tai Chi, although that is from before I started the med reduction. It's fine once I'm there, but at the moment it's cold and grim and dark outside, and I just don't have the energy to go there (although I would love it if I could teleport there).
On the good side, I've just ordered way too many pounds of yarn, some worsted weight in bright colours to make amigurumi and some beautiful light chocolate laceweight silk for a shawl. I've only made basic lace before, so of course the right thing to do is get very lovely, very think silk and dive to the deep end, right?
Tuesday, 28 October 2008
Slightly mad
Sunday, 26 October 2008
Links of the week, 26/10/08
... or links of the whenever Cristina has enough time, bother, energy and health, which apparently seems to be only every two weeks.
- Animal testing (no time of hysteria)
- I'm not just plugging this because I went to uni with the writer. I found it was a very good article on animal testing. I think I just dislike people preaching to me, which is what a lot of the activist against animal testing seem to do when they are out on the street campaigning.
- Bibliography for American Gods
- If you haven't read American Gods, by Neil Gaiman, I highly recommend it, especially if you like contemporary fantasy and/or mythology. This is part of Gaiman's bibliography for the book, and I would love to have the time to read it. Alas, knitting, the web, and work take up a lot of it!
- The best views from a toilet
- Pee with style!
- Death Star pumpkin
- That's no pumpkin.
- Cute pictures of animals
- I like the cute!
- Is there a God?
- As said earlier, I don't like preaching, but it's not the first time I have been ambushes by christians trying to tell me that god loves me and I should love him back. I have read the Bible, and it's not for me. I find this ads a bit of a refreshing change, and I like that they still have room for doubt. After all, we might be wrong!
- Mind erasing
- There are some things from my past I appear not to be able to let go. Nothing major, just little things that bug me, and end up spiralling out of control and making me down. So yes, no matter if those bad moments also made me who I am, I might want to get rid of those memories.
- Naked martian robot
- Might be not safe for work if your work doesn't like naked robots!
- Zeppelins!
- The surest sign that you are in an alternate reality is if there are zeppelins about.
- Baby pandas
- Today's overdose of cute is brought to you by south west China.
I also bought the book Creepy Cute Crochet yesterday, so expect some totally adorably eeeevil creatures popping up soon!
Wednesday, 22 October 2008
No meds
Today, I took no meds. I'm weaning down my last medication, taking it two days and resting one, and today it's the first of those days. If all goes well and my brain doesn't fry while doing so, I shall be med-free in about 4 or so weeks. I guess this is the pure and unadulterated Cristina.
Of course, today the pure and unadulterated Cristina is suffering from sleep deprivation and leftover sadness, so this is not a good indicator of how things are or should be going. I just need a couple of nights of better sleep.
Saturday, 18 October 2008
Holy Long John Silver, Batman! She's still knitting!
Unbelievable, I know! My migraines seems to have quiet down a little bit, so I can feel better, knit, read and play more, and then come and post about it here.
Ok, so my knitting time has been severely reduced by Olympos (book) and Lego Batman (for the Wii).
This is my foot modelling Alex's sock. You might remember I had trouble starting up this pattern. I ended up settling for a modified version of the Glob Trotter Socks. I adapted them for my gauge, and made the ribbing over a 4 stitches pattern, instead of 5. They are looking simple, as Alex's wanted them, but the seed stitch ribbing is keeping me entertained.
As well as the sock, I've been working on my Healing Jacket Take 2. I think I will have to frog the first one, but for now I don't need to worry about that. I've been working on this one during the worst of the migraines, which I thought was quite fitting. I've finished the waist decreases already, and I'm about to start the waist increases. The pattern, Knitty's Emerald, has also been modified to take my gauge, so I'm knitting and exciting combination of the sizes M and 2X.
I am quite happy with how it's turning out, especially with the tubular cast-on edge. It does look quite professional!
Ok, that might not be the bestest picture of the cast-on edge ever, but hopefully you will get the idea.
Wednesday, 15 October 2008
Migraines seem to mean reading
Except for Saturday, I have had migraines every day for the last week. I've had better weeks, and, although I know that they are partly related to the stressful week at work I had, they are starting to worry me. I think part of it is also that my brain is getting used to the decrease of meds: I just recently decreased my anti-anxiety medication, which is of the same family of meds as the medication I took a while back for migraine prevention.
I have an appointment with my doctor on Monday, so I will discuss this with her (ideally I'd like to find my copy of the neurologist report, just in case the one the NHS is meant to have has gotten lost in all my moves, but I don't think it's going to happen).
As a result, I've had lots of naps, lots of knitting and lots of reading, but not that much computer time, except for the 7.5 hours a day I have to put at work and brief email checks at home. The combination of sleep and painkillers is absolutely great, but I can't sleep all day. While the compute screen hurts my eyes, I can still read without extra pain, so that and knitting have kept me entertained when I have been awake.
I've started Olympos, and I have made quite a dent on Alex's socks and my Healing Jacket 2, so I'm quite pleased with that. I like reading, the problem is that there is not enough time in the day to do everything, so it's nice to just do it every once in a whle, even if for this reason.
There is no need for alarm, by the way: it's a fairly standard migraine, albeit a bit long than normal. One of my coworkers keeps looking at me and asking me how I feel as if I had the plague or was about to die, and it got annoying really quick.
I think my brain needs a reboot.
Sunday, 12 October 2008
Links of the week, 12/10/08
I've been working extra the last two weeks, due to a work deadline (this includes coming back home at 9 pm, which does not make me happy). That and migraines (related, I'm sure) haven't left me super happy. On the plus side, Alex's socks are the right size and I have worked enough extra to earn an extra free day.
- Nerbots
- Give a new life to old electronics and make them cute!
- I didn't knit that sweater for you
- If you are in Ravelry, you must have just not logged on for the last couple of weeks to miss this, but just in case
- Baby tigers!
- Baby tigers!
- Weaved geeky scarf
- I want to learn how to weave just for this. I would love this scarf
- Images of Mercury
- Mercury rotates soooo slow, that one side is completely boiling and the other frozen off.
- Baby orangutans!
- Baby orangutans!
- Two Lumps
- I discovered this comic thanks to Fluzz (hi Fluzz!), about the life of two cuts. Comics like this make me laugh out loud.
- Baby lambs!
- Baby lambs!
Sorry for missing them last week, blame it on the migraines too!
Tuesday, 7 October 2008
Memo to self
Never never never try to start a project when you are feeling down, unless you had selected pattern, yarn and needles when you were feeling well; even then, be weary.
I spent several hours yesterday obsessing over sock patterns, and gauge, and starting several times different socks, both casting on and just marking them as projects in Ravelry. It wasn’t working.
Today, a brief web check and a simple math calculation afterwards, I know I have to unravel the 3 rows of ribbing I managed yesterday and start again, but I know exactly the sock I want, the pattern and needles, and can work on it straight away. Cristina, let this be a lesson to yourself.